The first steps in finding happiness: the recognition and some basic elements – part 2: Why is all of this happening to me?


(If You would like to read this article in original Hungarian language than: click)

You’ve probably asked yourself this question, a few times over the years… When something bad happens to us and it makes us feel like we’re at a dead end and we don’t think this thing is fair from the universe, this question always pops up. And we don’t have an answer to it. Not even the second, nor the third time. But what if I told you, the answer was there, right in front of you all along you just didn’t know it. But why not? This is a very interesting question! In order to get a respond, we have to understand, why all the bad things are happening to us. The answer is in a sentence that a lot of people think of as a platitude: ,,Everything is happening for a reason”. But this statement is being misunderstood by most of us. We think, that this sentence is pointing to a higher force (God for instance) who is arranging everyone’s life. And even if we don’t understand what’s happening in our lives or why, He knows it for sure. (I want to stress that I’m not arguing about the existence of God! Every single one of my writings are independent of religion, and it is not my intention to take a side in this!) But the real meaning of this statement is this: The main goal of our live is the development of our soul, but why? Soul development is the thing that makes your old problems that caused you a lot of trouble, not being problems anymore. Someone who doesn’t evolve his or her soul will get the same kind of problem again and it will affect his life the same way (or even more) than it did before. 

Now let’s approach this from your perspective. Until you reach the next level in soul development, you will get the same type of problems back from life, until you solve it, or you die. Same kind of problem doesn’t mean you’ll always get it the exact same way. It means you’ll get it with different faces (so the problem always looks as if it’s a new one), but from  spiritual viewpoint it will bring the importance of evolving in the same thing. And solving the problem means that the person has stepped to the next level of developing his soul. That kind of problem will mean much less trouble for him or won’t even cause any. Let’s set up an everyday example, to help you understand the situation better! Once, I got to know a lady who was looking for a new relationship. She told me she was 38 and since she started dating, she had 8 serious relationships. The last one had ended recently and because she was lonely, she wanted to get into a new one. When I asked her gently, what was wrong with her previous relationships, she said that: each man was other than the “dreamed one” before, but all of their relationships went down in the similar way. Every time it lasted for 3-4 years that started with a few months of insane passion. Then in the next 1-2 years they were in normal relationship  with each other.    This was followed with 1 year of slow distancing. I asked her about the conclusion she made from these relationships. Her answer was typical: the perfect one hasn’t come yet. This is a perfect example how this process works. This lady was scared of spiritual intimacy but unfortunately she didn’t know about it, probably she hadn’t even thought about it yet. As a result of her fear, when the relationship needed a spiritual deepening, she always left her partner. She was in love with love and passion, but she’d never been able to reach a deep spiritual connection with her partner. Life brought her the same problem in different men every single time. She knew what she didn’t like in each man, so she tried to find different guys. She was a clever, wealthy and nice woman so she could choose from men. She always targeted men who were different than the ones before. But still every relationship ended the same way. Of course the real reason was not that she hadn’t find the “perfect one” yet, but that Life was trying to warn her, through every  relationships, that she had an issue and it was time for her to heal it. If she would not, she’d go through the same cycle in every relationships and then she’d be lonely. The chance of having a happy life would fly away and when she’d get old, the loneliness would bring the right answer to her. Sadly, the chance of a happy life decreases by the time we get old. But if she realizes that she has to work on herself than she has good chances of her next relationship being deeper and making her happier. The lady still doesn’t know that she has this problem, so her life obviously hasn’t changed much. But why are we unable to see the messages of life and why can’t we see clearer these spiritual questions? That’s what my next post will be about…

If you’re interested in the recent part of this writing than click.

 If you’re interested in the next part of this writing than click.

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