The second step in finding happiness: deep self-knowledge – part 3: That damn comfort zone

(If you wish to read this article in its original, Hungarian version, click here)

A recent great experience has served as today’s inspiration for me. I met up with an old friend and we had lunch together. I told him how pleasant it was to just look at him because of all the balance and joy he radiated. To which, to my suprise, he answered by thanking me for pulling him out of the mental state he’d been in 3 years ago and turning his life around. Today I was looking at a healthy and balanced man. The advice I gave him back then was: All the good things in life are outside your current comfort zone!

That is what I would like to write about today from several perspectives. Our comfort zone is all of the acts, places and habits that make us feel safe. We can get outside of this zone by doing something that fills us with excitement, stress or even a little fear. You should spend a week or two investigating yourself and figuring out how much of a staying-in-your-comfort-zone type of person you are! This is an important part of your self-image. Usually the people who are adventurous and often try new things aren’t the mentioned type. On the other hand, people who are happy with their usual lives are people who like to stay inside their comfort zones. This group of people can be split into two main groups. The first group is the people who are happy with their lives. This writing is not for them since they are already happy or at least they make themselves believe they are. The other group is the people who are constantly inside their comfort zones but aren’t really happy with their lives. Usually they have dreams that they like to fantasize about but they don’t make moves to achieve them (because it would require them stepping out of their comfort zones). In this group there are the delayers and procrastinators alongside the people who always have a reason not to take that risky step. Those who always think of the worst possible outcome if they have spontaneous idea are in this group as well. If you identify as a part of this ,,club”, I have a great question for you: If life inside your comfort zone isn’t good enough to stay for, than why are you staying? So the answer’s easy: Step out of your comfort zone!

Now, taking this step is great but don’t believe for a second that only awesome and good things await outside your comfort zone. There are also big mistakes, suffering, failures, etc.. But that’s just the way it is! If you step out of your comfort zone and fail in something, don’t worry for that is how it should be! Progress is rarely made without mistakes. We have to fall deep and then, once we’ve recovered from the fall, will we be better and more than we were before. The same happened to the gentleman mentioned at the beginning and to me as well, who knows how many times. The fear that you’ll get in trouble is only conservating your current state. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you can do anything without consequences. You should always be careful and remain aware outside your comfort zone! It’s not worth it to fall to depths that you can’t climb out of. But do step out! If you fail, start again, learn from your mistakes and be brave enough to continue! If you’ve read part 9 of ‘The first step in finding happiness’ than you know it’s not a coincidence that the first life supporting energy on the list is bravery and the last life opposing one pride, or the level of the ego. The ego is the guard of your comfort zone. ‘Bravery’ is the level where we have the strength to step out of the self-defense reflexes created by the ego and we finally dare do something to achieve our happiness! You don’t need anything else for this other than bravery! Be brave, be free and be happy!

DRDE

 

If you are interested in the previous part of this heading click here.

If you are interested in the next part of this heading click here.

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